I wouldn’t describe Philly as an inordinately crowded city day-to-day, but whenever there’s a big event like a Phillies game downtown, theĀ  Broad Street subway line becomes this weird underground misery-tube jammed full of all the people in the world, three times over. If you find yourself headed to such an event via subway, here’s some fun science tasks you can do:

  • Match all the different body odors to the right people. Be careful to avoid matching a human stench to a nearby animal corpse or ripe jug of trash water, and vice versa.
  • Count down the minutes before you hyperventilate yourself to death from being able to taste the body heat of 50 other people trapped with you in the unventilated wobbly filth-prison/team-spirit man-sauna.
  • Figure out what makes shoulder hair so much grosser when you’re trapped with it 3 inches from your face.*

Science makes everything fun!

<3 Mike

*Answer: It is shoulder hair.