For everyone from my family reading this comic, I swear all the thoughts written above are fictitious and meant to be expressions of a purely fictitious character.

For everyone not from my family reading today, I have several papers detailing my thoughts on boob-number/grossness ratios available for purchase. To get them, as well as an instructional and frankly inspirational DVD, please send a $700 cashier’s check care of my person to the Pervert Conservatory, 444 Creeper Lane, Scumtopia, NJ. No refunds, and remember, it’s important to fund the sciences!

<3 Mike

Semi-Not-Safe-For-Work link on how to manipulate the Land O’Lakes boxart so you can see the mascot’s boobs. Related news: The internet is a weird, weird place.