This realization happened to me not that long ago, and I had pretty much the same reaction as Avery*. If not for my girlfriend, who is generally responsible for me not wandering off into the woods to live hermetically amongst the bark and cold, lovely dirt, I don’t think I would watch any TV at all. It’s not that I don’t like TV, because I do, it’s just that I’ve lost the internal impulse to ever watch it. I don’t hate it, but like playing hockey or learning to play the Tuba**, I never have the want.

I’m not trying to come off as some kind of heroic anti-culture superstar and pretend I have “better, more valuable things to do with my time,” because not only do I find that a fairly obnoxious stance, I’m really not that person. I don’t spend my days doing pull-ups and reading Anna Karenina while preparing to sail around the world before learning French and retiring to a tiny island where I only throw the best parties. I sit in my little room, eat graham crackers and peanut butter for dinner, occasionally build fictional computerized empires,  and fret over whether a sentence should begin with “Say Avery, can” or just “Hey, can you” for hours***. It’s an oddly busy life, one that has strangely robbed me of my interest in crime procedurals or how Juliet from Lost is ever going to kill those damn aliens.

<3 Mike


Guys I really like these songs, they are like the prettiest things I’ve heard in a while. I know I’m late to the Rumbleseat party, but God damn, is there anything Chuck Ragan can’t make awesome?

*Minus the crushing grip. I have the waxen, sweaty hands of someone who spends way too much time at a keyboard/enjoys convoluted, grind-heavy roleplaying games. Not great at holding things in place, but you should see how well my thumbs press “A” as I methodically cycle through repeating menus while working for that sexy rare armor drop.

** As I write this, I realize this is kind of a lie. I actually wouldn’t mind learning a little about the tuba. Hockey though, I still think sucks.

*** The answer is probably the latter, though I don’t know if it would have been any less cumbersome. The correct choice probably would have been to recast and approach the first panel with a different scene. A lesson for next time I suppose.