Outrunning one or two Tom Pettys, sure. But 1,000? Just impossible. Once there are that many Pettys, they form a kind of hive mind, able to scrounge for nuggs, chase anxiety-filled 20-somethings, and sing songs in a high, ball-kicked keen that present bittersweet and retrospectively nostalgic images about American life.

(I was going to write something about how, no matter how it’s involved, nudity + Sinatra = a generally horrible time, but it seemed like a self explanatory claim to make. I have my own theories, and I’m sure you have yours. For now, let’s leave it at that.)

I suppose, like any other week, there is much to discuss. The most notable thing would be that we now have advertising on the site, an occurrence that has (oddly) become a moral victory for Dana and I, since now we’re officially making money off this completely ridiculous Internet venture. Or losing less money I guess, since we have to pay for hosting and all, but you get the idea.

MOVIE JIVE: They’re making a Sherlock Holmes movie starring Robert Downey Jr., which is all well and good, but if you watch the trailers, it’s some kind of action movie? Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for taking interesting liberties with source material, but to me, this seems a bit like turning Hamlet into a film that’s mostly about underground street racing.

Still, blatant X-mas action movie-itis aside, it looks like it could be a fun time. As much I’d prefer to see Downey in a period crime thriller sans fighting a giant guy wielding a mallet, I’ll man up and admit that I’m going to really love watch Downey fight a giant guy wielding a mallet. I’ll also admit the IMDB tagline of “Crime will pay” is more than enough to make Arthur Conan Doyle spin in his grave for at least the next 50 years. Oh movies, why do you tug my heartstrings so?

VIDEO GAME JIVE: I’ve sort of taken a break from Spider-Man: Web of Shadows, partly because I’m finding it pretty boring and too easy, but also because I’ve got that RPG-itch real bad. I picked up Blue Dragon on Friday because I love the Dragon Quest series, and was hoping the game would basically be like DQ for the XBOX. I think I clocked maybe two hours on it before my soul and mind began conspiring to kill me.

The main characters are incredibly annoying. Like, really incredibly. It’s not their horrendous visual design, which I could live with, but the voice acting is just baby-throttlingly bad, with the scripted dialogue being equally painful. I could have maybe muscled through if the gameplay was at least slightly interesting, but there were too many minor irritations for me to maintain interest. The shadow skills didn’t really present anything all that gripping, the map system is atrocious, and so far the environments have not only been beyond dull, but too big and winding to really navigate without being totally annoyed.

I am still determined to find a great RPG on the XBOX, but Blue Dragon is not it for me. Any recommendations would be much appreciated.

COMIC BOOK JIVE: I have since taken the plunge on HeavyInk.com, my first issue arriving a few days ago. It came in tough cardboard mailing envelope, in seemingly perfect conditon, with no polybag or accompanying backboard. Overall a pleasing experience, but I’m going to order a few more things from there before I issue an “official Internet verdict.”

<3 Mike